The Price of Love
by taciturnMasquerade
Summary: A fantasy AU. Red Velvet Pancakes (Canada x 2p!Canada). Matthew is the son of the leader of the elves. James is a member of the official EHL, or Elf-Hunter's League. The two should be enemies, but a forbidden romance buds that could cause them to lose their lives.
1. Chapter 1

**To lessen confusion, I will refer to Canada by his human name, Matthew Williams. Since 2p!Canada does not have an official name, he will be referred to as James Williams.**

I was the son of the elf leader, but I was still forgotten. Even if someone just saw me a second ago, they would forget I was even there. For that reason, I was considered to be the safest elf in the forest. If I was always forgotten, no evil human would ever find me.

Elves were taught from a young age to be wary of humans, for they were the enemy of our kind. They would hunt us down, wanting us to leave the dense forest that bordered their village, but this was our home. We believed the forest belonged to us, that we deserved it because we took care of it. But the humans would not compromise. They decided that if we wouldn't leave when they asked, they would just have to get rid of every pointy-eared humanoid figure they saw.

Therefore, the Elf-Hunter's League, or EHL was formed. Their one goal was to kill us, and even though I had glimpsed them many times before, never once had they caught me. This was the only reason why my father would let me roam the forest alone. No one ever noticed me, so I was safe. If they did notice me, I would be dead immediately. I was not a fighter. When I was younger, my father took time off from his official duties to teach me how to use bow and arrow. I took one look at the weapon, and ran away, not wanting to hurt anyone.

I remember that day clearly. It was the day I found my magical bear, Kuma. When I was hiding from my father, a bear came up to me and asked in a squeaky voice, "Who are you?" I wasn't too surprised that the bear could talk, since there was a variety of magical creatures in the forest, so I answered his question without hesitation.

"I'm Matthew," I answered quietly, then scooped the bear into my arms. It was so cute that I couldn't help myself! Ever since then, he and I were almost inseparable. He never got over the habit of asking who I was, though. It was very discouraging, as you would think my own pet would at least remember me!

Right now, I was sitting on a recently fallen log near a stream. Kuma was in my lap, and I was petting his head subconsciously while staring at the rushing current of the water. I had found this peaceful spot when I was exploring the forest a week ago, so I came back here today to just think. I hadn't had time to sit and contemplate things recently. My father was trying to get me to help with some of his duties as leader, as an attempt to get me to be more of a warrior like everyone else. I did love my home in the middle of the forest, but there is only so much time being cooped up there that I can take.

Us elves live in the most beautiful homes. They are built straight out of the abnormally large trees of the forest, hollowed out from the trunk and thick branches. An elite group of elves are chosen every year to learn the magic necessary to keep the trees alive. It is amazing, watching them work. Their hands glow a soft green, and tendrils of light envelop the tree. As soon as the tendrils touch the surface, the effects are immediate. The leaves perk up and turn a brighter green. The tree looks prouder, and if you put your hand to the bark, you can almost feel its happiness.

I sighed contentedly at the memories, but I stiffened when I heard a twig crack about twenty feet away. Turning around slowly, I scanned the woods for signs of movement until I spotted a face. Looking at _me. _ I felt a shock course through me when I realized, not only did they see me, they looked a lot like me as well. If you just cut his hair and made it a bit lighter, he would practically be my clone!

His piercing purple eyes looked at me, bored. He then stood up and walked over to me. When the human (for that was what he was) reached me, he asked bluntly, "Who are you, and why are you in the woods?"

_Did he not see my ears? _I wondered. Then my eyes widened. _If he's questioning me like this, like he should be in the forest, then he must be a member of the EHL!_ I edged away from him, looking for a way to escape the situation.

He gave me a look. "Are you going to answer my question?"

"O-Oh!" I squeaked, then looked down, "I'm Matthew. Umm... I'm in the forest because..." He just stood there, looking at me. He was very intimidating, and seemed to be in a bad mood. I tilted my head slightly, curious as to who he was and why he gave that impression to me. It's quite an interesting scenario to meet your look-alike, then find out that they're your enemy.

Apparently, tilting my head had moved my hair away from my ears, because in the next second, he had a knife at my throat. I gasped, then tried to shy away, but he had me trapped against a tree. Kuma fell from my arms onto the ground.

The man's eyes were narrowed. "You're an elf," he said bluntly, "So why do you act so human? And why do you look like me?"

"I-I just act like how I was raised to act. I wasn't trying to act human! And... I don't know. I wondered the same thing when I saw you," I answered shyly.

He just studied me for a second. My eyes started to fill with tears as I realized that this would probably be the end for me. Captured and killed by an EHL member. A single tear traced a line down my pale cheek. I felt the knife dig into my skin a bit deeper and I closed my eyes in fear. However, just as quickly as he had put the knife there, he took it away.

"I can't kill you," he muttered under his breath. My eyes flew open in shock. He backed away from me with an odd expression in his eyes.

"I-Thank you," I whispered, still in shock. He turned away without giving a response.

"W-Who are you?" I asked him cautiously.

He faced me again. "Why should I tell you? For all I know, you could somehow spread a bad word about me and get me kicked out of the village!"

I looked down, embarrassed. "I guess I just thought since you knew my name that you could tell me yours."

"Fine," he replied after a moment's consideration, "I'm James Williams. Member of the EHL."

I held out my hand, "It's nice to meet you, James. Although, it's quite a surprise that we both have the same last name."

He took my hand and shook it firmly before what I said sunk in. "We have the same last names?" he repeated in shock. I nodded before bending down to pick up Kuma, who had come to sit at my feet. James made a noise that sounded a bit like, "hmph", before moving to sit on the abandoned log. I hesitantly sat next to him.

"You know," I said quietly, "I'm surprised that you could see me."

"Huh? Why wouldn't I see you?"

I studied the water again. "Most people don't notice me. I'm just forgotten by everyone. Even by my bear."

James reached out a hand to pet Kuma. He replied awkwardly, "Oh."

He seemed to be different around Kuma. Was it possible that the gruff man had a soft spot for animals? I picked up Kuma and offered him to James. He took the bear, and a slight smile lit up his face when Kuma squeaked a small, "Hello!"

He looked at me, "I actually have a bear too."

My eyes widened and I smiled broadly. "Really?! That's amazing!" He smiled broadly at my excitement. Being around animals really did cheer him up, like it did me. I laughed, and just like that, we were friends, whether or not we wanted it.

That night, I returned to the house I shared with my father very cheerful. I was much happier than I had been for a long time. James and I had agreed to meet in two days time from now on the log by the stream. I finally had an actual friend! The only problem was that if anyone found out, I would be dead.


	2. Chapter 2

I was so eager to meet James again that the next day dragged by excruciatingly slow, making each second feel like a minute and each minute an hour. When I got up the dawn of the second day, the day I would meet him again, I practically leaped out of bed in my excitement. However, a slight wave of nervousness rolled over the thrill in my veins. What if James had forgotten about me too, just like everyone else?

I shook my head. _No. _He couldn't just forget something so special like that, could he? We had talked for hours, until the sun set! He had warmed up to me considerably, and I saw the person he was underneath his rough, antisocial shell. I felt that we had something special, and I'm sure he did too.

I sighed, then got dressed for the day in the typical elf garb. A tunic and pants, along with gauntlets and leather boots. There was nothing I could do about James now, so I might as well stop worrying and get ready for the day. I grabbed Kuma from where he sat next to my bed and left the room. Almost immediately, my father stopped me.

"Matthew, come with me. I need you for a bit."

I opened my mouth to protest, to tell him I needed to go find James, but I stopped myself. I couldn't tell my father that I was planning on meeting with the enemy today. So, I just nodded and followed behind him quietly. He decided to give me archery lessons, on today of all days.

Because of this, many exhausting hours later, I was finally released, a hot and sweaty mess. I ran up to my room to change clothes before heading out to meet James. It was now well past noon. I hoped that he would be there. I eventually made it to the log, muscles burning. To my relief I saw a solitary figure sitting there. I immediately recognized the long, strawberry blonde ponytail.

"James!" I called in my loudest voice, which wasn't very loud. He turned around, saw me, and smiled slightly.

"Hi, Matthew." I was so relieved to see him there, to see that he hadn't forgotten. I suddenly felt so extremely happy that I couldn't help but to shed a few tears of joy. He looked at my wet cheeks, seeming a little worried.

"Is... Something wrong?" he asked.

"No," I sniffled, "I'm just so happy to see that you didn't forget!" On impulse, I ran to him and wrapped my arms around him. I normally would be too shy to do something like that, but it just felt right when I was with James. It was natural. He seemed to think so too, because after a second where he stood there, surprised, he hesitantly reached around and patted me on the back.

"I didn't forget you. I can't." he said in his blunt way of talking. My cheeks turned pink and I looked at him.

"R-Really?" He nodded and his finger graced by my cheek when he released me from the embrace. I smiled happily, then went to sit down on the log.

James looked at me and frowned. "You didn't bring Kuma with you today."

"Oh! No, I left him at home. My father made me do archery lessons and I rushed over here right after changing. I didn't have time to grab him."

"You haven't told me about your father yet. Who is he?" I looked at James, realizing that he didn't know the whole truth of who I was.

"My father... I-Is the leader of the elves." I whispered.

James apparently heard the whisper, because he suddenly looked at me in a different light. "So you're telling me that not only are you an elf, you're the son of our greatest enemy?!" His voice rose slightly, and his eyes glinted dangerously. I instinctively shrank away.

"I-I just forgot to tell you! I'm sorry James."

His eyes kept the threatening glow to them for a little longer, before he took a deep breath and calmed down. "This is a problem. If you get found out by your father, he will kill you."

"I know," I said quietly, "But it's worth the risk." I felt James's eyes on me, but I didn't dare meet his gaze.

"As long as you feel that way, then I will also continue to risk my life to see you." I smiled at his response, feeling giddy. I stole a glance at him to see him staring at the water just like I always do. His hair shone in the sunlight that pierced the treetops. He looked beautiful in this light, I realized. It was funny, because usually the elves are the beautiful ones, but I was just plain old me. James's purple eyes flicked over towards me.

"What are you staring at?" I blushed hard and turned my gaze away.

"Are you going to answer me?" He asked in mildly threatening tone.

"I was s-staring at y-you," I stammered," "Because you looked so pretty in this light." I hid my face in my hands in embarrassment. His eyes widened slightly, but other than that, there was no change in his attitude.

"Actually, I think that you are the prettier one. All elves have a certain grace about them, including you." I blushed even more, and peeked through my fingers at him.

"You really think so?"

"Yes." I now stared openly at his face, and found his purple eyes returning the favor. I don't know exactly what happened after that, except the next second, our lips were touching ever so sweetly. A shock ran through my body, and it felt amazing. I could taste a slight hint of a smoky flavor on his lips, and I relished it. My brain was screaming at me that _No! This isn't right! He's your enemy!_ But I didn't care. I think I was in love with him, even after such a short period of time. My heart was pounding wildly, and I felt such a strong connection to him that we were almost the same person.

James's hand came up to the side of my face, and his fingers traced the outline of my pointy ear. I shivered slightly, then wrapped my arms loosely around his waist. Those ears represented the one thing that kept us apart. He was a human, I was an elf. We should have been enemies. He should have killed me the first day we met, but he didn't, and now here I was, kissing him.

I pulled back from him after a while, breathing heavily. I was sure my cheeks were bright red. Neither of us said anything for a moment. We just sat there, staring at each other. I was the first to break eye contact, not being able to stand looking into anyone's eyes for too long. I tightened my grip around James's waist, since my arms were still around him. He returned my embrace, and we sat like that for a while.

"What does this mean for us?" He asked gruffly.

I hesitantly looked up at him, "I-I don't know," I felt a thrill of fear run through my veins at what I was about to say next. There was no going back if I said it. I swallowed nervously, "But... I think I love you," I whispered.

James didn't reply. Instead, he grabbed my chin roughly with his calloused hand and connected our lips once again. He didn't need to tell me that he loved me, because I could feel it wherever our bodies touched. When he pulled away, I studied his eyes. There was no hint of fear in them; fear of being caught and killed. There was only determination, and something else behind that. Was it... affection?

A thought suddenly pierced my mind, and without thinking, I blurted it out. "James? Why didn't you kill me when we met?"

He looked mildly surprised at the question, but answered anyways. "You looked so fragile and helpless, like a newborn animal. I couldn't harm you."

Ah, yes. James's soft spot for animals. It made sense that animals would be the reason for any softheartedness shown on his part. It did surprise me that he thought I was like a newborn creature, though. I had never been compared to one before. It made my heart swell, knowing that he compared me to one of his all-time favorite things.

I gave him a shy smile, "Well, I guess it's a good thing you didn't kill me." His lips turned upwards a little bit, and we stayed like that for a while, not needing words, just each other.

Eventually, James sighed and pulled away, "I have to go."

I forced down a pang of disappointment and nodded. "When will you be back?"

"Two days time." With that, he left. It was like an unspoken agreement that there would be no goodbyes. Because if we said goodbye, it would be like admitting that one day, this perfect utopia would fall to pieces and we wouldn't see each other ever again. Because nothing good ever lasts.

I forced away the dark thoughts, and instead concentrated on the wonderful things that had happened today while I walked home. I had fallen in love, and had my first kiss. I had felt important, wanted, needed. I had someone who would never forget me.

I finally reached the elf settlement, and stopped in my tracks, shock coursing through me.

"What?" I whispered. All around, there were elves in battle gear, clashing with practice swords. There were often elves practicing at this time of day, but never this many! I spotted my father surveying two dueling elves, and ran over to him.

He eventually noticed me, and I asked, "What's going on?" His eyes stared at me, lit up in a way I had never seen them before. They seemed almost... hungry.

"Ah, Matthew! There you are! I have some important news!" I tilted my head, awaiting his words.

"I have made a big decision. We have started training procedures for combat. We will declare war against the humans by the end of the week! The time has come for humankind to feel our wrath!"


	3. Chapter 3

My head spun and the world turned blank for a moment before I recovered. "No," I whispered.

Apparently, my father didn't hear me because he continued onward, "And I have put you in charge of one of the battalions. It will be good practice for you!"

Another blow. That meant I would be ordering elves into battle, causing both them and the humans they were attacking to die. One of those humans might be James. He could die because of me. Shot down on the battlefield, his blood spraying around him. His body going limp and falling to the ground. _No no no no no! _I couldn't let that happen, but what could I do? I had to stay loyal to the elves, because they were my people, the ones that will always be at my side. But James was the supposed enemy. If I was in a situation where I had to order his death, I could never kill him. Just the thought of seeing the life fade out of his beautiful purple eyes was sickening. But I couldn't warn him of the war, because what if he would tell the EHL? It would be his duty, and then I would cause the entire plan to fail because of my own selfish reasons. I couldn't possibly do that to my father.

All of these thoughts ran through my head in a matter of seconds, and the burst of emotions that they caused almost made my legs give out. I felt such agony ripping my heart apart that I had to struggle not to cry, and even then my eyes clouded with tears. Then again, I have never been very good at hiding my emotions. This was one time when my invisibility truly came in handy. My father didn't notice the painful emotions running through my eyes, and instead just dismissed me to my room, saying, "We'll talk more tomorrow."

I ran off to my room quickly, barely holding back the tears. I collapsed on my bed next to Kuma, who had been awaiting my return. He nuzzled my face gently, and I wrapped him in my arms.

"Oh Kuma..."

"Who are you?" He asked innocently. That did it. I burst into tears, feeling my heart wrenched apart and stomped to shreds. I only had two days until I saw James again; two days to make a decision. I could warn James of the impending war, risking the lives of all my fellow elves, or I could stand by my kind, protecting them to the bitter end. Just two days ago there wouldn't have even been a choice. But a lot could change in two days. I clutched the blankets on my bed in frustration. Why did this have to happen, right after I just had the happiest moment in my life?

The kiss was still so clear in my memory, unfogged by time. I could still remember the river flowing just a few feet away from where we had sat, the sunlight burning down onto it and being fractured into a million pieces. I still could feel the slight breeze that had tousled my hair. And most importantly, I could still remember the love that had blossomed in my heart. The same love that was causing me so much pain now. What was I supposed to do in this situation?

I took a deep breath and forced the sobs wracking my body to slowly subside. I had to think. Surely there was another way where I could save James and the elves could still fight and win. I could maybe tell James, but I didn't know if I could trust him to keep that kind of information a secret. At that moment, I realized that I knew next to nothing about James. I knew that he was a human and a member of the ELH. I knew that he put on a rough exterior, like armor, but he shed it around anything small and adorable. I knew that I loved him and he loved me. But other than that, he was like a complete stranger. I didn't know about his home life, his friends, what he did in his spare time. I didn't know where his loyalties lay. That was the most important one. Maybe I could ask him? I would have to find a way to do it without seeming to suspicious, but if I did that... I might be able to make my decision.

A fantasy shot through my head of James and I running away together, but I shook my head to disband it. He would never agree to that, and it wouldn't solve the problems of the places we would leave behind. I just had to take this one step at a time. Tomorrow I would see if I could find James, even though he hadn't agreed to meet then. Tomorrow. My eyes slowly fluttered shut and I succumbed to exhausted sleep.

* * *

I must have slept through the entire night, because the next time my eyes opened, I could see the sunshine through the window in the tree my room was in. I immediately closed my eyes again, not wanting to face the world quite yet. However, Kuma started nosing my face, getting it cold and damp, so I eventually groaned and sat up.

Before I could go searching for James, I had to go talk to my father. He said that he needed to talk to me later, so I decided I might as well get it over with now. After getting ready for the day, I made my way outside to see my father already up. I trudged over to him, then said, "Hello Father. Did you need me?" It took him a little while to realize I was there, but once he did, he got down to business.

"Matthew, you will be in control of one of the front lines. That means you will be active on the field first, and will require some more training before you are battle-ready. Your force will be of a hundred elves, all under your control. All of them will be broken up into five smaller groups, controlled by one leader each. They will report to you and you will report to me. They all have second-in-commands already, but you will be responsible for choosing your own. I will have to approve them of course, since they will be reporting to me if you go down." A thrill of shock ran unpleasantly through my veins when he spoke of my death so casually. Was that all I was to him? Just a disposable figure, easily replaced if I die? I looked down at the ground, slightly depressed at the thought. My father rambled on for a while longer about random military related things that I probably should have been listening to but I couldn't bring myself to concentrate on.

"Well, I think that's all. Did you get that Matthew?" I nodded my head, a blatant lie. "Well then, I expect to see you at this afternoon's training session. For now you are dismissed." I nodded again before hurrying off to the forest.

I didn't even know where to start looking for James, but I knew I had to start somewhere. I decided to head to the outer edges of the forest and make my way in. I started moving gracefully through the brush coating the ground in varying shades of green.

It seemed luck was on my side today, because I hadn't traveled for five minutes before I heard a voice that sounded like James's and the stomping of feet against dirt. The only problem was, James wasn't alone. There sounded like there was another person with him, but I couldn't see them from where I was at. I crept a bit closer to see if I could hear their conversation a bit clearer. When I could see them, I confirmed my suspicions. The voice I heard had been James.

I heard the man with James say, "Ready to go kill some elves?" accompanied with a laugh.

I waited anxiously for James's reply, and it came soon after. "Let's spill their blood. I want to see them suffer."

I barely suppressed a gasp. He didn't mean that, did he?

"Just as eager as always, James. You do the name of the EHL proud!"

"I'm glad to make those elf-scum suffer." Tears filled my eyes at the coldness of his voice, but I still refused to believe that he meant it. He _loved _me. Surely he was just putting on a show!

"Hey, then why did I see you with an elf the other day?" The tone in the man's voice had turned suspicious. _This man saw us?! _

However, James replied coolly, "It's all part of a plan I had made. That elf was the son of the leader. If I could find a way to get to him and kill him, then it would most definitely break the spirits of the elves. I decided to get him to trust me first before I turned around and stabbed him in the back. Literally and figuratively." This time, the tears in my eyes spilled over, and my throat burned with the taste of betrayal. He had said that so matter-of-factly, like there was no room for doubt. He really meant it. I had come here to ask him a question that could determine the fate of the elves, including me. I now had my answer.


	4. Chapter 4

I had never experienced such a crushing feeling before, but I knew what it was. It was my heart breaking, and James had caused it. The tears pouring down my cheeks were not nearly enough to make the sadness inside me dissipate. I wanted to do nothing more than just run back to my room and mope for days, but that wasn't an option, seeing as how we were preparing for war. I had solved my earlier dilemma regarding my loyalties, but right now I couldn't care less. This wasn't supposed to be how it all ended! There should have been love, love that overpowered the hate between elves and humans and caused all of us to unite. But instead, all that existed was emptiness. Emptiness and war.

How could I have been so stupid to trust the enemy, and fall in love with him in a matter of days? I should have been more cautious. I probably would have been more cautious if it was anyone but him. James made me feel a way I had never felt before, but obviously he didn't return my feelings.

_Why did I have to fall in love with him? Why not some pretty elf lady who I could settle down with peacefully for the rest of my hopefully long life? _

I sighed. Apparently, an easier path wasn't an option for me.

Eventually, the steady flow of tears wetting my cheeks slowed to a stop. I wiped at my eyes, which I was sure would now be surrounded by a rim of red. It wasn't yet noon, but even though my battalion wouldn't be out training yet, that didn't mean I couldn't practice. With a way to distract myself in mind, I reached the elf settlement rather quickly. No one was out on the training field yet. Because of this, I decided it would be okay to use an actual sword, since no one was there to get hurt. Normally, I wouldn't practice anything violent in my free time, but we were preparing for war and I was desperate for a way to forget James.

I selected a sword, then took a few practice swings to get used to the weight in my hands. The sun glistened off of the polished metal of the blade. The hilt was plain, since the only decorated ones are the ones privately owned. I happened to have my own sword. I got it when I was 10, tried to use it that day, then put it away and never touched it again. After that, I just used wooden practice swords whenever I was forced to train. Even though most of the details of my sword have faded from memory, I still remember the pattern on the hilt. It was delicately carved with maple leaves, my favorite type of leaf. There was also a beautiful garnet adorning the end. It was so polished that you could see your reflection in it. That sword was beautiful, and my father will probably force me to tarnish it with blood.

I took another swing with the sword, and imagined someone at the receiving end. At the thought, I winced and tried to banish my imagination.

_How am I ever going to fight a war if I can't even hurt a make-believe person?_ I chastised myself viciously. Steeling my resolve, I convinced myself I _had_ to do this. I had to learn to kill, or I would be killed. Once again, I swung the blade, this time in a heartless blow that would cut through the gaps in armor or slice a head right off. I had to be strong for the elves, for my father. They were all I had now. A sad smile stretched across my face, my violet eyes full of bittersweet memories. Just a couple of days ago, I had no one other than them, but I was still happy. But now, I know what I'm missing, and it hurts more than any other pain someone could cause me.

The sword I held slipped to the ground, my hand turning limp. It hit the dirt with a soft _thud._ I felt an uncontrollable ache in my chest, yearning for what I couldn't have. I sank to the ground, the chill of the dirt quickly soaking into my skin. My hands were clutched over my heart. It was like instinct, to hold the part that was hurting, but it didn't help at all.

With a shock that pierced through my heart, I realized that James still believed that we would be meeting tomorrow. I didn't know what to do. On one hand, I never wanted to see his face again. On the other, if I went I could break this off cleanly, and it might ease the hurt, knowing that we would never be together again. The idea seemed rather appealing to me. Being able to see him one last time... But what if he tried to kill me then? I attempted to reason with myself. However, I knew what I truly wanted, and once you know that, it's only a matter of time before you're forced to accept it.

If there were any more tears left in me, I would have wept in despair. But there was nothing left inside me. All I could do was wait until I saw James again and try to stop myself from hoping we'd be together once more.

The next morning, I woke up with a pit of dread filling my stomach. However, my heart was full of eagerness, no matter how hard I tried to suppress it. Yesterday, I had to train with my battalion, and I had chosen a second-in-command that my father approved of. At the end of it all, I had come back to my room and collapsed in exhaustion. Groaning slightly, I slowly stood up from bed, feeling my muscles ache from yesterday.

I went through my regular morning routine in a haze, then walked outside, planning to enter the forest. Just like two days ago, my father came up to me once again. "Matthew!" He said in his strict voice that I learned was his commanding tone he used in battle. "You can take today off from training with your battalion! You worked hard yesterday with them, so today I want you to practice your own personal fighting skills." I nodded hurriedly at him, intimidated by the sharp tone. His facial expression thawed, and his face filled out in a smile. "I'm proud of you, Matthew."

I gave him the smallest of smiles back. Even though I was outwardly the same, the statement sent my brain into turmoil. _If only he knew what I was doing in the forest. He wouldn't be so proud then._ A moment later, my father left me, off to do who knows what. Honestly, right now I didn't care. All I could think of as I ran through the forest was James, his beautiful face, his purple eyes, his grumpy attitude, his cold words... Tears stung at the corners of my eyes and my throat tightened, but I pushed it away angrily. Now was not the time to cry. I had to be strong.

The river came into view, along with the log. Our log. James wasn't here yet, but I knew he would be. It was just a little early. I settled down on the log, tracing the bark with my finger. The river flowed a few feet away like it always did, and like it would for a long time to come. Even when I was dead and gone, that river would keep on flowing, carving a path for itself. Carving something that would last a long time... A burst of inspiration hit me suddenly. I scrounged around in the débris scattered on the ground, and eventually found a sharp rock.

I pressed it to the bark of the log, then carved down harshly into it. I wouldn't have even dreamed of doing this to a regular tree, but this one was dead, so it would feel no pain. In deep strokes, I created an image. An "M" and a "J". A heart and a jagged line, slashing the two letters apart, right down the center. An endless division, there for eternity, keeping them apart. Keeping us apart. I dropped the rock to the ground, where it lay dejectedly.

I heard a voice behind me, "Matthew," was all it said, but I immediately knew who it was. James. I stood up slowly, trying to suppress both the excitement and the dread welling inside. I walked over to him until I was only a foot away. He wasted no time in closing the gap and kissing me harshly on the lips. There was so much passion behind that kiss that I felt myself melting into it, gripping his shirt-front in an attempt to stabilize myself. I quickly came to my senses though, and pushed him away, using my hands that were now flat against his chest.

"No," I whispered through my labored breathing.

James's eyes narrowed threateningly, "Why?" Was all he asked. His hands held a tight grip around my waist.

A single tear made its way down my cheek, after a failed attempt at trying to stop it. "I-I saw you yesterday. In the forest, with the other EHL member. You... You said..." I couldn't continue. My heart was shredded enough.

I could tell the split second he understood me, because his eyes widened in shock. He quickly recovered, and gripped my arms tightly. "You idiot!" He hissed.

A coil of fear unfolded inside me. "W-What?"

"I was lying so he wouldn't know about us! I wasn't just going to tell him the truth!" His face was just inches from mine, and he looked incredibly angry.

Hope blossomed in my chest, but I refused to give in just yet. "But you sounded so serious..." I sniffled. "Why should I believe you now? I don't want to end up dead!"

James sighed, his gaze slowly softening. His arms made their way around me, and pulled me close. I didn't protest. "I could have killed you the first day we met. If I really wanted to kill you, I would've done it then and gotten it over with. But I didn't. Because I love you."

I wrapped my arms around him, the happiness inside me blocking out any doubt. That was the first time he had ever said those three words. "I love you too," I whispered back, before tilting my head up to meet his lips in a kiss. This time, it was full of salty tears, of heartbreak and forgiveness. It was even more perfect than our first kiss. My lips parted slightly, basking in the taste of him. It was just like before: smoky and wonderful. We stayed like that for what felt like eternity, before we both pulled back. I rested my head in the crook of his neck, and my lips gently brushed his skin.

Being together like this was precious, wanted for so long, savored in the days following, but altogether very little of our time was actually spent in each other's company. I relished every second he was here with me.

A crunch of leaves sounded suddenly, breaking me out of my train of thought. Immediately, James jumped back from me, and I faded into the shadows, doing what I do best. Being invisible.

He stood in the center of the clearing, arms crossed. Other than the slightest blush on his cheeks, one that was barely noticeable, there was no sign that he was just kissing me. An EHL member walked into the clearing. I could tell they were one not just because of the uniform they wore, but also because of the way they walked. As if they owned the whole forest. As if the patch on their shoulder made them the rulers. I hated that patch. It was arrow and sword, crossed in an X with EHL in front. Every single EHL member had one on the shoulder of their forest green uniforms. They were always bristling with weapons too. Weapons for killing elves like me.

Suddenly remembering that my life could be at stake, I bolted away from the clearing on light feet. No EHL member had ever spotted me except for James, but I wanted to be safe. Only once I got back home did I realize that I never told James about the war, and I wouldn't be getting another chance to warn him.


	5. Chapter 5

The next couple of days I did nothing but training, as my father was pushing me even harder than before. If he noticed my despair, he never commented, but I wasn't expecting anything else. My father only saw what he wanted to see, and he didn't want to see an anguished son.

But it was hard to be anything but that. Every time I picked up my sword, I looked at the sharp edge and imagined it splattered with blood, blood of things once living. It made me go weak in the knees, and it took all the willpower I had to keep standing. The worst part was, I could also imagine James, defeated and at the mercy of an elf, one that wouldn't hesitate to kill him. The thought was so horrifying I tried to convince myself that it wouldn't happen; it couldn't. But I knew that it was a strong possibility, and I was the one at fault for making it that way. Every day, I berated myself over not telling James, for running away like a coward. The coward I am. If only I had just stayed a bit longer, until the EHL member was gone. I could have come back and told James. He would have been safe. But now, here I was, training to take him down along with the rest of the EHL. And I would be at the front of the army.

"Matthew!" A deep, commanding voice reached my ears. Immediately, I knew it was my father. He probably had a sparring partner for me. Lately, he had been trying to get me more skilled at sword-fighting, so he paired me against any elf he could find at random times. I looked down at the weapon sheath strapped to my belt, knowing that it contained my sword inside. I had found it recently, and it was even more beautiful than I remembered, shining a deadly silver in the midday sun.

"Matthew! Wherever you are, come right now!" The last words had a hidden threat behind them, as if saying, "Or you'll be punished later." Even though I knew my father would never do that, I squeaked and ran over to him as fast as I could.

"I'm here, father," I said in a quiet voice. I never seemed to be able to speak any louder than that, which I thought would be a problem on the battlefield, since I would need to shout commands. However, when I voiced this worry to my father a while ago, he dismissed it, saying, "You will manage, I'm sure." I doubted that, but I also knew never to doubt his orders. He was the leader, after all.

"I have prepared a sparring partner for you. Use actual swords this time." With those much expected words, my father walked off, his piercing gaze observing the activity in front of him. I turned to face the elf I was supposed to fight and was surprised, although not in a pleasant way. I had seen this elf around camp many times before, and she was one of the best fighters there were. She had even cut her dark hair as short as a boy's as to not be hindered by it while she was in combat. I didn't know her name, but she was impressive.

Her brown-eyed gaze was cool as it surveyed me. "Hmph. I was hoping that the leader's son would look a little harder to beat. I haven't had a good fight in a while, but already you are a sore disappointment compared to them." I knew this tactic. All the insulting was an attempt at making me angry, so my emotions would cloud my judgment. It seemed she didn't know me well at all. I was not the type to get angry at just a few insults.

I decided to stay silent, instead withdrawing my sword. It came out with a soft _shink! _and the weapon shined, reflecting any light cast upon it. The hilt was gripped firmly in my palm, fitting perfectly. I looked over in the direction of my opponent, and saw she held her own sword with confidence, her eyes narrowed in concentration.

I barely had any time to react when she lunged at me. Somehow, I managed to avoid the attack, jumping out of the way. I may not be strong, but I have quick reflexes. She was a good match for me in that regard, being lightning-fast herself. However, she was a more experienced fighter than I was, aiming strike after strike relentlessly. This meant I was at a huge disadvantage overall. Even so, I still fought, losing myself in the battle. My vision narrowed in on just her and the sword she held, forgetting that there was anything else in the world.

Her blade moved quickly, swinging down at my exposed side, but I twisted and blocked her sword with my own. The clashed with a loud _clang _and she pulled back quickly, not wanting to expend strength on beating my sword down to the ground. She wanted blood. The thought surprised me, as I had never seen someone so bloodthirsty, so eager to kill. She was the type that wouldn't hesitate to kill James. At the image that provided me, I let out a small gasp. _No. I can't let her kill him! _

With a sob of despair, I threw myself at her, my first offensive move since the fight began. Her gaze widened in surprise, but she countered the attack efficiently. I pushed forward, blow after blow, determined to not let her win. Every move I made she countered easily, and it lasted for several minutes of parries back and forth. Finally though, I pierced through her excellent defense, nicking her above her left eye and shedding the first blood. The wound, while it was not major, was enough to blind her in one eye, seeing as she wasn't able to spare a hand to brush the scarlet liquid aside.

She growled in anger, most likely not used to being the one shedding blood and shook her head in an attempt to clear her eye. In the second she was distracted, I lunged forward, intending to knock her sword away. But she was expecting it, and avoided the disarming move with ease. She replied with a swift and complicated counter-attack, forcing me to retreat while I tried to learn the pattern of the technique.

I was forced into action when she aimed the tip of her blade to pierce my stomach. We weren't supposed to cause any major wounds, but it appeared that she had forgotten that. A burst of fear exploded inside me, but I shoved it down as best I could, wanting to focus on only one thing: defeating the opponent that stood in front of me. I got out of the path of her blade as it swooped through the air and lunged forward with my sword pointed at her throat. She danced backwards and in a circle, smirking at my clumsy attack.

"You'll have to do better than that to beat me!" Her over-confident voice rang out. The words gave me an idea. If I couldn't beat her with my sword skills, I would have to beat her by exploiting her weaknesses. I looked at the ground and let my sword hand fall.

"You are right. But I cannot do better."

She looked at me suspiciously, eyes slightly narrowed. One of them still had blood in it, but she didn't seem to care. "Is this a surrender?"

"Well, I can't do any better than I have already," I whispered, refusing to say that I surrender, for then the fight would be over.

She sauntered over close to me, then put a hand on my head, forcefully pushing me to the ground. I let my knees meet the dirt and bowed my head. "Say you surrender," she ordered.

I looked up into her face, framed by sweat-soaked hair. "I..." My voice faltered for a second, before it came out, loud and clear, "I will never surrender!" I didn't waste any time in marveling at the volume of my voice, and instead lifted the sword that was in my grasp. Before she could react, I knocked her blade out of her hand. She gasped in shock, then tried to go after her sword, which had skidded across the ground. However, I held my weapon to her throat, restricting her from moving. Her brown eyes flicked over to me, full of shock and dismay.

"Do you surrender?" I asked quietly.

When she offered no reply, I slowly forced her to the ground with the sharp tip of my sword.

"Do you surrender?" I asked again, no louder than the first time.

She looked at me with pained eyes. Obviously the only thing stopping her from saying yes was her pride. But I was willing to wait until she had gotten over it. I needed this victory, for James. He was the only reason why I fought so hard, to try to make it up to him. It was all I could do, and I was sure that I would do anything for James. I would even die if he needed me to.

My opponent's soft yet angry voice broke me away from my train of thought. "Yes. I surrender."

I sheathed my sword and walked away. There was no triumph in my step. Just sadness and determination. I would find a way, no matter what it took. I would do it for James.

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**I know that this chapter may seem way OOC for Matthew, as he usually does not act so violent. However, I like to believe that when it comes to defending the things that he loves, Matthew will step up to the challenge and will do whatever it takes to succeed.**


	6. Chapter 6

**I'd like to thank the following people for reviewing, following, and/or favoriting this story:**

Anya. kun, Guest**,** FireFox Vixen**,** Justwannacomment**, **Iluna Sorgina Talis**, **Kathryn Daughter Of Hestia**, and **Shadow Elvin Angel**. I can't thank all of you enough for supporting my story!**

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People finally started noticing me after I won that duel. I saw elves openly staring in my direction and whispering to their friends. Things like, "I've heard he's the best fighter in camp." or "That's the leader's son. He's amazing with a sword." Even though I've always hated being ignored for all my life, I missed it now. All of this attention was rather off-putting, and I felt it was undeserved. The elf I had beaten yesterday was a much better fighter than I am. I defeated her with luck and strategy, nothing more. Even though I told this to my father, he was still very proud of me, saying, "Strategy like that will make you a wonderful commander and leader someday." I had just bowed my head in reply, not feeling the argument was worth it. He laughed at that, a deep hearty sound. "Always the humble one, I see!"

That was the last time I had heard him laugh. Now, with the day of the battle getting ever closer, he became more and more serious. His smile disappeared and his eyes grew hard. Lines of stress started to appear on his face, and I was worried that he was overworking himself. Even though every elf was working hard, he seemed to be toiling away at least twice as hard as anyone else.

I felt the stress weighing myself down as well. Every day, the same routine of personal training, a brief break, then training my battalion in maneuvers and battle strategies. It was mind-numbing and exhausting work, and made it impossible to think about anything else. My throat was hoarse from shouting commands for hours, my vocal chords not used to the strain. Over the past couple of days, I had learned something: War changed people. It made them become something they weren't and forced them to face their flaws. War was heartless, and showed no mercy to the weak. It would force you to shape yourself into what it wanted you to be because the only other option was to be dead.

I found this idea rather depressing, but I knew it was true. It had changed my father, and it had changed me. No longer was I a shy, soft-spoken elf, at least on the outside. Everyone now saw me as someone that had finally grown into himself and the person he was expected to be. However, what they couldn't see was that it was all just an act. I was still terrified of violence and hated speaking loudly. I wished I could go back to being me, but war had other plans. War wanted to turn me into a warrior, and it was doing a wonderful job.

Even now, I was surveying my ranks, my stance tense and uptight. I suppose I looked like a true commander, one afraid of nothing and determined to get the job done. However, contrary to appearances, I dreaded the day when I would have to kill another living creature.

I didn't think that killing should be something any elf should have to do. We're supposed to be creatures of nature, appreciating what we have instead of destroying it. We have the power to strengthen trees, not harm them. We live among the forest and the other creatures in it instead of razing it to the ground. However, this war threatened to destroy that image. In fact, it probably already had. After all, instead of living the life they usually did, exploring and appreciating the forest, all the elves spent majority of their time in camp preparing for war. Some elves didn't have fighting duties, instead assigned to other aspects of preparing for battle, like medical procedures, but in any scenario, the results were still the same: all the elves were changing in this time of need.

I sighed, scanning the masses of elves in front of me once again. They were a turmoil of clashing swords on the field in front of me. Further into the distance, I could see elves shooting arrows at targets, being trained for long-distance fighting by their own commanders. Our home had morphed into a battle training ground, and it was no longer the place I knew and loved.

Hearing footsteps behind me, I turned to see me father. "Hello, father. Do you need something?" I asked in a polite tone.

His eyes were weary, but he still attempted a small, albeit stiff, smile. "No. I just wanted to see how your battalion training was coming along. It seems to be running smoothly."

I nodded my head in affirmation, then turned back to watch the sparring elves. Even though I was several feet away, I could still see the sheen of sweat on their skin and the dampness of their hair sticking to their faces. "You have them working hard," my father murmured, seeming deep in thought.

I glanced at him before turning my gaze to the ground. "We're all working hard these days," I replied, "I can see the exhaustion in everyone, even you."

My father must have been surprised at the statement, as he didn't say anything in return. I turned my purple gaze to meet his tired eyes. "I'm worried about you. You're working too hard, and I can tell how worn down you are. Can't you at least let someone help? Y-You don't have to be alone!" My voice cracked near the end, and I felt a hot tear fall down my cheek.

I felt my father's hand grip my shoulder firmly, his touch warm. "Matthew," he said firmly, "Don't worry about me."

His words only made me cry harder. "H-How can I not worry... about y-you? You're my f-father and... and I don't want anything b-bad to happen to you!" I buried my face in my hands, feeling salty liquid drip through the cracks in my fingers. Sobs wracked my body, and I felt my father wrap his broad strong arms around me in a comforting hug. I clutched his tunic and let my tears soak into the fabric, not caring how childish the display may look to any elves that happened to be watching.

"It's okay Matthew," he murmured comfortingly in my ear. "This is part of war. I must do my job as a leader, and no matter how I look to you, just know that I am strong enough to do it, and if ever I am not, I will get help. Does that make you feel better?"

I sniffled, wiping my eyes and pulling away. "Yes. It does. Thank you," I whispered softly. He nodded, satisfied with my response.

My father started to walk away, but then turned back. "You've changed a lot over the past few days. I'm proud of all you've accomplished. Stay strong, son."

The rest of the tears on my cheeks dried as I nodded my head, and I put on a determined front. My father believed in me. I had looked up to him since I was young. I never had any other role model because my mother died at birth, leaving just the two of us. He was also the leader of the elves at that time, so there was no one else to look up to. He always seemed so strong, and to hear him tell me that _I_ was strong and that he was proud of me? ...Well, it meant a lot.

I turned to my ranks, and as expected, many were staring quizzically at me, some with a hint of concern in their gaze. "Get back to work!" I called out in my loudest voice, and they responded immediately, leaping into skirmishes. They were so quick to react to orders and their movements were precise. We were ready for battle. The only thing missing was the order to fight.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning, instead of waking up to the sun streaming in, I was pulled out of my sleep by a sharp rapping on the door. Shooting out of bed, I ran over and pulled the door open. I was greeted by the stoic face of some random elf I had never seen before.

Without wasting any time, he said gruffly, "Come to the conference hall. Five minutes."

My eyes widened at that statement. The conference hall was the place where all important meetings were held between the higher ups of our society. I had never been there before, so this could only mean one thing. Because I was a commander in the war, I was invited to a meeting regarding that dreaded thing.

Sighing, I closed the door and walked over to my bed, trepidation making every step heavy. Changing into day clothes, I picked up the still sleeping Kumajirou and hugged him close.

"I really don't want to go to that meeting," I murmured in the sleepy bear's ear. "But you already knew that, didn't you?"

He tilted his fluffy head up towards me, eyes half closed in his partially awake state. "Who are you?"

"I'm Matthew," I muttered, sounding slightly irritated. With that, I left the room and practically sprinted down to the meeting hall so I wouldn't be late. Just because I didn't want to go didn't mean that I could skip out on the meeting.

I arrived at the hall a minute late, banging open the doors in my haste. Only a few turned in my direction, their eyebrows raised. Flushing in embarrassment, I slowly made my way to an empty seat and sat down, ready to listen. The meeting hall was one of the few actual buildings there were in the elf settlement. Everything else was built into trees, the walls sloping gently with the curves of the giant trunks. This room was more rectangular, and the harsh edges felt unnatural to me. Kumajirou seemed to think so to, as he whimpered and hid his head in my shirt. My heart softened at the sight, and I stroked his fur gently as my father's powerful voice filled the room.

"As I was saying, before we were... interrupted, the time has come. We are battle-ready and our hearts are full of lust for blood. Starting today, we will no longer be the ones running in fear!" Deep down, I had known this was coming. It didn't make the blow any softer, however. I sat there, silent, my heart frozen and my breath caught in my throat. I didn't even hear anything else my father said, as my ears refused to listen. Only when everyone else started to leave did I realize I had been sitting there for a good five or ten minutes and the conference was over.

I stood up slowly, reluctantly, my mind a tumbling mess. I didn't even hear what my orders were, and whatever they were, how was I ever going to make myself follow them? I couldn't hurt James or my father. How do you choose between the two people you love most? I didn't know.

But I had no time to dwell on the fact, for when I was leaving the hall, my father's heavy hand on my shoulder stopped me. When I turned around, he asked, "Are you ready?" I must have given him a blank look, because he sighed heavily and said, "Were you even listening at all?"

Blushing madly, I looked at the ground and gave a small shake of my head. Even though I didn't dare look up, I could imagine the look of disapproval on his face as he repeated my orders. "Your battalion is in the front lines. You will be taking the humans by surprise. The elves under your command will spread out over 50 square kilometers of land. Two per every kilometer. We don't want to be too clumped together because that will arouse suspicion. And if ever anyone finds themselves in danger, they cannot call for help. No matter how much I hate to abandon them, we must keep our cover for as long as possible. It's the easiest way to take out as many EHL members as possible. As you already know, you have five platoons under your control. Each of them will report to you and you'll report to me. Make sure everyone under your command is ready in an hour at the latest. Understood?"

I looked up and met his eyes. "Y-Yes sir!" I said, giving a small salute. Even though he hadn't told me to, it just seemed like it was the right thing to do.  
"Then you are dismissed," my father ordered. Nodding, I left the conference hall, my footsteps slow and heavy. Mentally preparing myself, I made my way to my expectant troops. They must have known that there had been a meeting, because they were all waiting for news.

I stood at the head of the crowd holding Kuma, and in my loudest voice, I shouted at them, "Today is the day we go to war!" I forced myself to sound excited as I continued once their cheers died away. "We will make up the front lines. To keep the element of surprise for as long as possible, we will be splitting into platoons to attack," thinking quickly, I added, "I'll discuss the details with the platoon leaders and they'll relay the information to the rest of you. Dismissed."  
Only after I finished my little speech did I realize just how much responsibility my father had put on me. I was a frighteningly under-experienced sergeant major to have part of the front line under my control. My father had almost too much faith in me. It seemed that everyone else did too. After I beat the female elf (I learned later that her name was Oretha Feirtana) everyone thought I was worth more than I actually am. And that was before we had even gone into battle. After all, I thought bitterly, I can't even choose what side I want to be on.

The hour that my father had promised us passed all too quickly, and soon my battalion was in full battle gear, bristling with weapons and covered in lightweight armor. The metal glinted in the sun, creating a dazzling array of light that gave the omen of death and destruction.  
The image did not stay still for long, as the order was shouted to move out, and the metal moved forwards in waves. After a while of watching, I followed, footsteps slow but determined.

I didn't know how this war would end, or if things would ever be the same in the aftermath. But I was determined to find a way to make our ending a happy one.

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**So I'm going to end this fanfic here, because I've completely lost inspiration for this story. A thousand apologies to anyone that was reading this. For those that need to know what happens, after a lot of struggling, it all ends up good for both James and Matthew. Not perfect, but good. I know this is a horrible ending, and who knows, maybe one day far in the future I'll come back to this. But for now, The Price of Love is finished.**  
**-CobblestoneHeart**


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